Filed under: Fleeting thoughts..., painting, printmaking, Sewing | Tags: Cy Twombly, fabric, painting, pouch, sewing, watercolor
Yay! Spring is here! Get out the lightweight mittens! Get out the waterproof, yet non-bulky, knee-high boots! Get out the gauzy, cotton scarves!
Just kidding…
It’s in the mid 20’s and I’m bundled up like an Eskimo. Right now, I’m wearing a down coat in the house. My feet feel cold.
Beyond the perpetual climate woes in the Northeast (did I mention that Boston broke its snowfall record this year? Yay/Boo!), I sprained my knee recently, which is beyond annoying. I’m not a good patient, as I avoid seeing the doctor, do internet research, and hope for the best. I have a perfect excuse for laying on the couch all day eating bon-bons with my leg elevated, and yet that seems like a tedious way to spend the day. Instead, I hobble around trying to do stuff, wondering WHY my leg doesn’t feel any better. It’s kind of sad that I’m not even 50, and I’ve already started moaning about my aches and pains. Would you like to discuss the pros/cons between three different types of knee brace? No? Do you think that if I wore all three at once, it would heal faster?
In spite of my aching leg, I’ve managed to play around a bit with sewing, printmaking, and painting. I made a little pouch for my SIL:
It’s cute, right?
Here is one of the annoying things about photography that I struggle with…COLOR CORRECTION. Here is the same pouch in direct sunlight:
Looks pretty different, right? AAAARGH. I hate dealing with trying to reproduce accurate colors. It wouldn’t matter if I wasn’t listing things on Etsy. But because I am, I’m constantly struggling to get accurate color. It’s truly maddening. Well, it’s not as bad as cooking and grocery shopping, but a close second.
I took a 6 hr printmaking class on reduction printing. It was fun, even though I made some serious disaster prints. We just used those cheap styrofoam plates to print with. Here is a tutorial on this kind of printing. I was sort of content with this print:
You can do this kind of printing at home without a press, so give it a try! Do not accidentally lean your elbow on your styrofoam plate because you will:
a. get ink on your elbow
b. make an indentation in your plate which will affect your print.
Unless, of course, you’re into elbow prints. Who am I to judge?
I was also mucking around with watercolors too. In grad school, I took a VERY ANAL RETENTIVE watercolor course. We were doing Beaux Arts watercolors like this:
I know. WHY was I learning this in architecture school, as it’s soooo stodgy and traditional? I wanted to learn how to do this as it was an actual SKILL. Have I used that skill since then? No, but whatever. ANYWAY…I brought this up because this is my only experience with watercolor. Very rigid. So, this week, I started to just play with watercolors…generally making a mess.
I kind of liked doing these! Just blobs of color. Look at the cool effects you get with watercolor:
Neat, right?
I have basically spent the majority of my life trying to be precise and perfect in what I do (except for cooking and cleaning). Now, I’ve realized that this is total B.S., and it’s better to be messy. Notice that my fish print is completely anal retentive, YET AGAIN. Okay, so I fell of the wagon a bit. Clearly, I am still struggling to stop being that way, but I am working on it.
There is a reason that I love Cy Twombly’s work:
THE MAN
I love his work because it is SO free. That may not be the academic interpretation of what he does, but it’s mine. I love how visceral and messy his work is. LOVE IT. As a recovering perfectionist, I yearn for this…
Sigh! (Cy!)
Filed under: Fleeting thoughts..., Sewing | Tags: baby legs, etsy, post office, quilting, sewing
I know. It’s a stressful time of year. I get it.
But why is it that the post office closest to me has staff that are the LEAST helpful? Actually, surly might be a better word. I was bringing a sold Etsy item to the post office. I was using a free padded envelope for priority mailing that I had ordered from the post office. I printed my label. I was all set. UNTIL…I reached the desk at the post office.
“You can’t send this in that envelope.” Blank stare.
“Why?” I asked.
“Because you have a Priority Mail Express envelope, not a Priority Mail envelope.” Blank stare.
“Well, my paid shipping label says Priority Mail. Could you just put some Priority Mail stickers on the envelope and cover up where it says Express?”
“No. I can’t do that. You have the wrong envelope.” Blank stare.
“But this envelope is physically identical to the Priority Mail envelope…except that it also says “Express.” Can you just cover up the word, “Express” with some of your Priority Mail stickers which are right there next to your hand?”
“No.” Blank stare.
I kid you not.
I ended up going to the OTHER post office in Arlington. And do you know what the woman behind the counter at the OTHER post office said? WELL! She said that she would put Priority Mail stickers on it, no problem! IMAGINE THAT!
SIGH.
I know that I should be more forgiving…but that was totally ridiculous. That is not the first time that this employee has made me feel like my head was going to explode with frustration.
Avoid this post office like the plague unless you want your head to explode
Grumble.
So, I participated in a neighborhood Holiday Sale at a friend’s house yesterday. It was so much fun! I had a great time chatting with the other artists in the area and the neighbors that came by. I even sold a print and a scarf! WOO HOO! I did eat a ton of Christmas cookies, so that wasn’t so good. Here’s a bunch of new stuff that I’ve made:
Isn’t it beyond cute??? It’s a little quilted pouch, and it’s around 5 1/2″ in diameter. It has a zipper, and the lining matches the border. Adorable, right???
Here is the NEXT one that I’m doing:
I did some basic hand quilting on this one. As soon as I can finish it, I’m going to photograph it and put it up on my Etsy store. Unless, of course, I decide that it is too cute, and that I must keep it. Mine!
I also made these other pouches, which are listed:
and
Cute, right? The top one just sold recently. Woo hoo!
Okay, I’ve got to run to do the bajillion errands that seem to be piling up…much like the dust bunnies that surround me.
Speaking of running…check out the photo of these baby legs that I found online:
I want to die, these are so cute. The next time that I have to go to the post office, I am going to pull up this image on my phone to fill my mind with happy thoughts about fat baby legs…even if it turns out that I have to deal with surly employees and that I do have the wrong friggin’ envelope.
BABY LEGS!!!
Filed under: Drawing, Fleeting thoughts... | Tags: art, crafts, drawing, pouches, sewing
Last night, I attended the opening reception for a short “pop-up” drawing show in the South End. I have four drawings on exhibit, along with the works of many UBER TALENTED Boston artists: Chuck Holtzman, Sandra Allen, Barbara Grad, Linda Etcoff, Eugene Dorgan, Summer Wheat, and Conley Harris. Please check out all of their websites…the work is gorgeous. The show is curated by Conley Harris, and held in his studio space in the South End. I was SO thrilled to be included. These are really some of the top artists in Boston, so it was fantastic to see their work and to meet some of them. The show is open today (11/14) and tomorrow (11/15) from 11am to 5pm at 1140 Washington Street, Boston, 3rd floor. Go see it!
These are thumbnails of the work of Eugene Dorgan, Sandra Allen, Conley Harris, and myself. Dorgan does breathtaking charcoal portraits that are moody and compelling. Allen is a graphite pencil virtuoso who draws with otherworldly beauty, sensitivity, and scale. Harris’s rich and layered drawings seamlessly meld remnants of photography with layers of gouache to create fantastic “Nature Morte” works.
I’m SO sorry that I don’t have any pictures!!!! I forgot my ipod, which is what I typically use for photos. SIGH. At least I made it out of the house properly dressed, and not in pajamas. It’s tough being a suburban mom.
My other big achievement since I last posted is that I MADE A COAT. No joke! Here it is:
It’s wool, so it’s pretty warm. I started it with a pattern, but then the pattern was so bizarre…I had to make numerous modifications. It’s cute, right???? I even added the collar, which it didn’t have originally. Here is the inside:
Okay…THAT, I love.
In addition to this coat, I also made a couple of little pouches as gifts for some friends:
The coffee cup sketch is actually a screen print onto some printed fabric.
I do all of this stuff, and then I wonder why my house is a mess. Well, it’s messy because: a. I’m messy, and b. I dislike housekeeping. Simple! I also have enough stuff to fit into a house that is approximately double the size of the one that I am actually living in. My son is equally messy, which is clearly a sign that I am being an awful role model YET AGAIN. Luckily…my husband is pretty neat, or else we’d be in serious trouble. Why does my son seem to pick up my worst qualities? He’s messy, he can be grouchy/short tempered, and he scowls a lot. Hmm. At least he doesn’t have frizzy hair…yet.
If anyone out there is a “neat person”, I would greatly appreciate an “intervention” at my house to teach me how to be a neater person. If it involves throwing out any art supplies, fabric, or yarn…then, I’m afraid that you’ll have to leave. Feel free to take away the vacuum and my pots and pans…but leave the mohair yarn and fabric paint, thankyouverymuch.
I’m just going to rearrange some piles now so that I can get some work done…don’t mind me…
Filed under: Fleeting thoughts..., Sewing | Tags: drawing, etsy, Halloween costume, pokemon, Pokemon characters, sewing, spoonflower
Yay! Fall is here! I love the colors on the trees…apple picking…apple eating…pumpkins…the whole thing. One thing that does trouble me, however, is the dreaded Halloween costume. My son has told me that he wants to be some kind of Pokemon.
Oh.
Great.
For those of you that don’t know, there are a billion different Pokemon characters, and none of them look remotely like a six year old boy. Example:
Seriously? How am I going to make any one of those into a costume??? Suggestions?
What if I bought a Pokemon stuffed animal, and just strapped it to his head? Weird?
He spends a lot of time drawing Pokemon, which I think is cute:
I think that those are made up. I mean…I know, I know…ALL POKEMON ARE MADE UP. I meant that these two are not “official” ones. Basically, I’m going insane over here with the Pokemon nonsense and I need someone to talk to me about something adult and tangible. World news? Syria? Ebola? Honey Boo Boo?
Hmm. Depressing.
Perhaps non-stop talk about Pokemon isn’t that bad after all!
So, my minor achievement (besides vacuuming) is to have actually created an Etsy store! Check it out here. Yes! You can now buy some of the crazy stuff that I make! So far, not much has happened. The odds of anyone “finding” my stuff on Etsy is similar to the odds in Horton Hears a Who.
Right? Sigh. It’s tough being a metaphorical dust speck. If you have any constructive feedback about my Etsy store, PLEASE LET ME KNOW.
I’ve recently gotten some fabric back from Spoonflower that I’m using to make scarves. Spoonflower is an online, on demand textile printing service. So, you can design your own fabric and then have it printed! It’s kind of cool Here’s what I made:
It’s a knit infinity scarf. Here it is again, with more of the green showing:
I love it! I need to find a reasonable looking person to model it for me. Actually, I know tons of reasonable looking people, just not any that would be willing to be photographed for Etsy. Hmm. Yet again I am feeling the disadvantage of not looking like a supermodel. Sigh.
Maybe I should take a cue from a famous artist and try this strategy for modeling?
Rene Magritte, Les Amants
Right??? I could even cover my head with my SPOONFLOWER FABRIC that I DESIGNED!
Would that be appealing, or sort of freaky and disturbing? I’m thinking the latter.
Maybe I can just photoshop on a cute head?
man, baby, manbaby by Ed Alkema
WHOA. Okay…NOT a good idea.
Oh…nevermind. Just let me know if you’re a supermodel and would be willing to either:
1. Model my Etsy creations.
2. Go grocery shopping for me.
3. Vacuum.
4. Take out the trash.
Thank you!
Filed under: Sewing | Tags: etsy, hand made, photography, purse, school photos, sewing
I am SO happy to have time to work again! I’ve scurried around my basement studio space furiously trying to clean in up in order to be more productive. It’s better…I’ve got sort of an “organized hoarder” set up. I keep fantasizing about living in a more “minimal” way, but then all of the things that I like to do are the OPPOSITE of minimal: sewing, knitting, drawing, painting, ice hockey. Why can’t I be more cerebral? Oh well.
Is it time for lunch yet?
I recently finished making a cute bag:
The entire purpose of making this bag is to sell it. Unfortunately, I kind of want to keep it. SIGH. This is a problem that I have often. The inside:
See! I even made a little pocket inside with a fabric label on it!!!
I love the little wood bead zipper pulls. How can I possibly sell this? On that note, I’ve started trying to cobble together an Etsy store. It’s a lot of work!!!! I’ll let you know if I ever get it up and running. How much should I sell this bag for? $1K? $2K? Just kidding…sigh. If you say $20, I shall give you a good whack with a knitting needle. It’s HAND MADE…for goodness sake. You can’t get that at Old Navy! Hmm. Maybe they have cooler stuff at Old Navy? Oh well.
Remember that silk chiffon top that I mentioned in a previous post? I finished that too! It nearly killed me. I vow NEVER EVER to work with that fabric again. It’s worse than silk charmeuse…it’s like trying to sew cotton candy. Here it is:
Sorry about it being wrinkly. I wore it, but couldn’t be bothered to iron it for the photo. I love it! It was a royal pain to make, though…
Don’t you like the cool layering effect? No? Too bad! If anyone has any helpful sewing tips for chiffon, besides finding someone more skilled to do it for me, please let me know.
Does anyone out there in cyberspace have an Etsy store? Or, do you shop on Etsy? If so, what do you think of these product photos? Are they nice, or shoddy? I still haven’t found an available super model to photograph with these items. I realize that deficiency may result in fewer sales. I don’t really want to put MYSELF in the photos, as that will GUARANTEE lower sales. Hmm. Seriously…photo feedback appreciated.
Speaking of photos…my son is having his school photo taken on Monday. I have to select the background that they will use. I have a choice of: corpse grey, two choices of electric blue, electric purple, smouldering ember orange, and sooty emerald green. Not great. I still can’t figure out which is the least hideous. Why can’t the kids stand in front of a leafy bush, or something natural?
Which would you pick? Ech. I’m worried about choosing the blue, as my son has a lot of blue shirts. His photo would end up looking like a floating head if his shirt matched the background…also not good. Maybe the gray??? I wonder if they can photoshop in a smile, as my son tends to scowl at cameras? That might cost extra. He also needs a haircut, but photoshopping in that will probably cost more than the haircut.
We seriously need to find a new place to get his hair cut. The place we go is SO SLOW, and it pains me to even contemplate taking him for a haircut. We ALWAYS have to wait somewhere between 1-2 hours until it’s our turn. Haven’t they heard of APPOINTMENTS??? Why can’t I schedule a time to be there so that I don’t have to try to entertain a six year old for two hours in a barber shop? Nightmare. They do a good haircut, though.
Okay, I’m off to try to do something remotely useful. I’m not sure what that is yet, but I’m sure that it will come to me. If you know of any places to get a good kid’s haircut THAT TAKES APPOINTMENTS near Arlington MA, let me know. And, no, a Flowbee is not an acceptable alternative.
Filed under: Drawing, Fleeting thoughts... | Tags: art, camp, crafts, drawing, sewing, wood shop
Today is my son’s last day at camp. SOB!…sniff sniff…That means that next week, I have to be on mommy-duty 24/7. YIKES. Some people delight in that. For me, it puts me in a sort of low-grade panic. HOW are we going to pass the time??? HOW am I not going to go postal??? I’m sure by the end of summer, my son will be thrilled to go back to school and get away from me. I know that I would too, but…unfortunately, I’m stuck with me.
He has made some priceless creations at camp this year:
They have “woodshop” at camp. Isn’t this super cute? This will be used as the centerpiece for the head table at his wedding. (Just kidding…maybe…)
This is a tiny door. I suppose that we could put it at the base of a tree, as if it was the entry to a gnome house? Apparently, my son smacked his thumb with a hammer when making this. Ahh…this is the timeless injury which began when early man first started using tools! It’s 2014, and we still do it today.
Look at this ridiculous graphic that I found. What kind of moronic image is this? Who puts their thumb ON the nail???? Should that even be considered an accident??? Why do I immediately think of Congress when I see this? I know that doesn’t make sense, as something is actually HAPPENING in this image.
But I digress…my son’s last creation from yesterday:
I forgot to ask my son what this is. It looks like something that would be legal only in Colorado. I’m not sure what they’re teaching those kids at camp, but I can overlook it because they make him lunch. Yes, I’m THAT kind of mom. I’m just glad that there is no licensing exam for being a mom, or else I’d be undoubtedly parenting without a license.
So, yesterday was the reception for a show of my drawings. It was fun for me, because it is at my old office. These were some images of the show last Friday when I was setting it up:
There is a blog write up about the show here. It was great to see many of my former co-workers. I was also really happy that some of my non-architect friends came as well. I was kind of stressed about the show before I hung it, but I think that I had forgotten how nice everyone is at my old office. I could tell that I wasn’t used to getting out much in the adult world because I referred to someone’s water bottle as a “sippy cup.” WTH? My son doesn’t even USE sippy cups anymore. CLEARLY, you can take the mommy out of the house, but you can’t take the house out of the mommy. Perhaps someday scientists will find some correlation between Stop & Shop and early onset Alzheimer’s?
I wore one of my latest creations to the reception:
I’m pretty happy with it! My sewing skills are improving…thank god. It’s hard to work with silk. I’m realizing that silk chiffon is even worse, but I’ll show you that project when/if I finish it. And the back:
Do you think that I could sell these on Etsy? Or, am I the only person what would wear this kind of thing? Probably. Growing up, I was always the weird kid who dressed strangely. This clearly hasn’t changed with age. It’s less endearing now because people don’t think, “How cute!” anymore…instead its, “Why is that old, fat lady dressed like that?”
Because she’s cray cray…that’s why.
Time to get back to my life and death battle with silk chiffon…so far the score is: Silk Chiffon:3, Me:0.
As my son was both out of school and not yet in camp, I was inundated with “mommy-time” recently and could not write a post until now. Camp is a fantastic thing. We’re lucky that we can send my son there. It’s definitely cheaper than having me institutionalized from my son being home all summer, right? I’m so selfless.
My stepdaughter turned 18 this month. YIKES! Where does the time go???? In preparing for her family birthday party, my son dressed his Sasquatch up in festive attire:
Notice the red shoes and rakish tilt to his hat. This Sasquatch doll has become the most entertaining thing in the house. I guess my son has seen me sewing clothes lately, and decided that he would make some clothes as well. His look better than mine, naturally, but I’m trying not to feel too intimidated. I’m going to plagiarize some of his tape details, though…
During the past few mommy-madness weeks, we had a ridiculous incident of a bird “nesting” in my car:
Isn’t it cute? I got into the car, and saw the bird nestled into the front of the car, between the hood and the windshield. I got out of the car and stared at it…thinking that my mere presence would frighten it. Apparently not. THEN, in my neurotic way, I imagined that perhaps the bird was ill with RABIES, which was why it was behaving so oddly. (Luckily, no one uses that gauge on me, or else I’d be getting shots more often…) So, I got BACK into the car, and started the engine. The bird blinked and stared back at me, unruffled by my 4 cylinder Toyota starting up. I decided to drive off, hoping that the movement of the car would jar it out of its zombie-like stupor. No luck. I started to fret, as I needed to head to the Mass Pike. What would happen to the wee bird then???? I couldn’t let it blow away on the Pike!!!! Luckily, as I was driving along with him STILL ON MY CAR, I went over a small pothole (or not really so luckily), and he flew off at last. Disaster averted!
Okay. Not only has my life been reduced to such minutiae, but you’re actually reading ABOUT my minutiae. Oh wait, don’t take that the wrong way. Did I just lose my only reader? Wait! Come back! I promise to somehow make this more interesting somehow! PLEAAAAASE!!!
Just kidding. I’ve got no way of making this more interesting.
I have a friend who has lots of sari / saree fabric from India. I’ve been making simple, draped tops out of them.
This looks really nice on. It’s silk, so it has that sort of iridescent quality where the green and the red threads overlap.
It’s kind of hard to tell in the photo. He likes it, and has asked me to make three more! (BTW, these are not for him, but for his girlfriend and family.) I made a more plain one here:
I know…pretty simple. The bottom edge is hemmed with gold, and there is a double layer of fabric at the top. The saris were going to be taken to Goodwill, so I’m glad that I can rescue some of them to become clothes. It also helps when you’re willing to wear something weird, as I am.
Okay, I PROMISE that my next post will be interesting. I’m not sure how I will manage that, but I’ll really work on having SOMETHING INTERESTING happen in the next week or so.
Does going to Bed, Bath & Beyond count? No? Hmm. What about Target? Trader Joe’s? How about Home Depot? Oh, never mind…
Filed under: Drawing, Sewing | Tags: animation, anne toebbe, art, barbara moody, boston, joe fig, mcsteez, sewing
The school year is wrapping up, and I’m in panic mode thinking about what I’m going to do with my son before his camp begins. I know that letting him eat candy all day whilst watching cartoons is NOT an option. Hmm. I also know that joining him to play Godzilla with his toys is also NOT an option, unless I want to go completely koo koo and wind up institutionalized. I don’t do “imaginative play” with figurines well. I don’t know why. I can’t do it. Build with blocks…yep. Draw with markers…yep. Action figures…nope. Can’t do it. I always end up doing something silly/hilarious, which makes my son mad. Play is serious business! I can’t play with action figures in a serious manner. I just can’t.
In order to try to get some art exposure before the dreaded post-school/pre-camp weeks arrive, I went with a friend to First Friday in Boston. We always have a good time checking out what the galleries have up. We have an even better time getting the required “post-gallery-beer,” but I digress… Barbara Moody, our studio critic for the A.P.T. program, had an opening that night at Kingston Gallery. It was great to see her and her new work! This is an image from the Kingston Gallery website:
Barbara Moody at Kingston Gallery
She creates wild landscapes that overrun fragments of architecture. I love the color palette! I love the marks, the layering, and the overall energy and vitality! She also has a series of very small works that are bold collages of imagined landscapes. Those were also wonderful. Go see this show, as it will close on June 29.
We stopped by Steven Zevitas Gallery and saw the work of Ann Toebbe.
Anne Toebbe at Steven Zevitas Gallery
I loved her work! She creates these flattened out domestic interiors from collaged paper. Each one made you wonder who’s room it was, and whether they were all from the same house, or different houses…
Anne Toebbe at Steven Zevitas Gallery
Aren’t these great???? My photos are terrible, so you have to go and see it for yourself. Her work will be up until July 5. Go see. Now.
We also caught the work of Joe Fig at Carroll and Sons. Joe Fig wrote a great book, Inside the Painter’s Studio, where he interviewed famous artists and then recreated their studios in miniature. LOVE IT. Here is what Leonardo Drew‘s studio must look like:
It’s hard to appreciate the detail of Fig’s work. Here is a bit of a close up:
This is TINY. Can you believe it??? Look at the messy paint cans! Look at the extension cords! HOW DOES HE DO IT??? Anyway…I have his book, so I was thrilled to finally see on of his works in person. I also love Leonardo Drew, so it was cool to have a peek into his world, even though it’s mini. I really could have looked at this for hours, but then I didn’t want to get too many nose marks on the plexiglass case. I should show this to my husband just to prove to him that I’m not the only messy person on the planet. Joe Fig would rather eat one of his models than have to recreate my household chaos in miniature.
Besides making nose marks on plexiglass, I haven’t been up to much lately…except for THIS…CHECK IT OUT!!!
WOO HOOOOO! Yes, that’s a friggin’ SERGER! Mwahahahahh…I’m sooooo excited. Now, I plan to dash off shoddily made items with reckless and foolhardy speed. 1,500 stitches per minute! Imagine what kind of trouble I can get into!!! Here’s my first serger project:
I know…I know…I should have ironed it…but remember? I’m ironing-challenged! I love this day-glo tomato color. Side view:
I look like I’m falling over. Hmm…probably had the camera crooked. ANYWAY…notice the ruching at the side seam???? My first time trying that out…it turned out okay! Because this isn’t Vogue magazine, I didn’t Photoshop my backside to make it smaller. If so, I would have posted this:
Don’t I look more skinny? Ahh…the alchemy of Photoshop! I hope that they incorporate that feature into the new Google glasses. That way, everyone would look as they would like. Kind of like beer goggles…but different. I think that I’d make myself look like Zooey Deschanel, even though that change would be pretty traumatizing if someone took off their glasses. Oh well.
Not bad, right???? The pattern is one I drew up based upon I shirt that I already have. I suppose that’s cheating, right? The whole thing is so simple that it doesn’t seem like THAT original of a design…hmmm. I’m a long way from Project Runway…especially as they would spit upon my serger. BUT WHO CARES???? I love it. It’s “quick and dirty” sewing. Actually, based upon my housekeeping skills, mine is mostly “dirty”…
So, my husband recently discovered the work of Hombre_McSteez. He does AMAZING animations on acetate(?) held in front of some actual scene. Please watch THIS VIDEO on Youtube to see some of his stuff…
You also have to see his instagram feed…HERE.
You’ll never look at a green bean the same way again. At my house now, we all can’t stop saying, “I am a plant!” or “Me WOOT!”
My parting words for today are: Me WOOOT!!! Discuss amongst yourselves…
So, buckling under the crushing weight of peer pressure, my son is now interested in Pokémon. No joke. Shouldn’t that be passé by now???? Clearly not. At the school book fair, he purchased this:
I’m not kidding when I say this has to be the worst book EVER. Here’s a typical sample of writing:
Dawn’s Solaceon Contest combination is called Rainbow Swift. When Ambipom spins and uses Swift, it fills the Contest auditorium with brilliant stars!
What. The. Hell. Are. They. Talking. ABOUT???
The ENTIRE book is like that.
Brock and Croagunk enter the Pokémon Dress-Up Contest, but Brock doesn’t expect to win. His Croagunk is excellent at imitating Politoed, but it’s competing against Ash’s Pikachu and a champion Chatot. But when Team Rocket tries to steal the prize, Croagunk stays in character even while it helps chase them down. That dedication earns Brock and Croagunk first place and a prize Pokémon egg!
This is what is offered at a school book fair??? More to the point: this is what is considered “a book?” (You’ll notice that I find no fault in the parent that bought the book.) SIGH. No wonder why kids today are illiterate and are in need of meds. This book makes me want to like down and take some Valium.
The only good that has come of this book is that he spends a lot of time drawing the characters:
I think that’s pretty cute. Like mom…like son…spending hours drawing pictures! Perhaps next time I should get him a book on the works of Albrecht Durer? Wouldn’t that be more educational? Or is that kind of beyond tiger mom and bordering more on Tasmanian devil mom? In reality, I’m more like three-toed sloth mom:
This is what I’m like most of the time. It’s kind of sad.
I have gotten some stuff done…but the house is still a mess. Here’s what I’ve been doing instead of housework:
So, I made this silk blouse! I also dyed it! Isn’t it cool? It was a bit longer, but it took me three attempts to hem the thing. Sewing silk is like trying to staple olive oil. It’s kind of a slippery mess. Anyway…I think that I got the hang of it, somewhat.
Hmm. I need more practice ironing clothes, though. So, this is the kind of think that I thought that I’d try to sell on Etsy. What do you think????
Because I have no standards, I actually wear what I make. The question is not only: “would anyone else wear this?” but also: “would anyone PAY MONEY to wear this?” Hmm. Not sure. I suppose if I had Giselle Bundchen to model it, perhaps. I would have to specify in the listing that I am ONLY selling the shirt, and that Giselle is not included. Honesty is the best policy! Really, at that point…I could probably put a trash bag on her and sell it, right??? Hmm. I have some marketing challenges here…does anyone who looks like Giselle Bundchen want to model clothes for me? No? Oh well.
If my taste in clothes is not weird enough, I’ve also taken up a new hobby: ice hockey.
I’m kind of obsessed with it. It’s beyond fun. It’s hard being a beginner, though, as there’s so much to learn! There are also so many opportunities to hurt oneself! Actually, at the level that I play at, it’s pretty tame. Any injury that I get would probably be self-inflicted. Kind of like this:
THAT is one of my favorite movie moments. Does anyone know what this is from??? If I had anything of value, I’d give you a prize for the correct answer. I’ll give you a hint: Ruprecht.
Okay, well that’s enough nonsense for one afternoon! Now, I have to “get to work” doing something besides housework. Wish me luck!
Filed under: Fleeting thoughts..., Sewing | Tags: nail art, sewing, vacation
I have made it through spring vacation week with my sanity mostly intact. I took my son to the Ecotarium in Worcester one day. I was trying to be a responsible mom, and not just let him play with his rainbow loom for eight hours straight while I stare at a wall drooling from excessive kindergartener exposure. The Ecotarium is a hands-on science and nature museum for kids. It even boasts a train ride! Unfortunately, the train isn’t working. It has a “tree canopy walkway!” Unfortunately, that’s closed as well. Humph. The vending machines work, though…if you need lunch because there is no cafeteria.
This is an image from the Ecotarium website:
Doesn’t that look lovely and educational??? Do not be fooled…the museum must be closed. A more accurate photo would show a maelstrom of kids and parents swirling around battered islands of educational displays. This is is pretty much the case with all indoor kid destinations: The Children’s Museum, the aquarium, The Museum of Science…etc. etc. They’re all the same. As a result, I typically avoid them like the plague. Bad mommy! I SUPPOSE it’s fun for kids. I’m not really sure. I know it’s not fun for parents…until they get a soundproof room with WiFi and a barista.
At least they had some live animals to look at. We got to see a soft shelled turtle, a spotted turtle, a bald eagle, some owls, a turkey vulture, a porcupine, a skunk, and other stuff. I loved watching a turtle munch on a big piece of lettuce. Adorable. Why are they so cute? Who knows.
I actually managed to get a surprising amount of stuff done this week, in spite of it all. Here’s some of the stuff that I made:
A bag for a friend’s daughter:
A pouch for a friend:
I also reupholstered two chairs. I’ve been meaning to do this for about four years. No joke.
They turned out pretty well, all things considered. I know that they’ll stay nice looking, as I won’t let anyone sit on them.
We also managed to survive Easter. I did such a good job hiding the eggs that we didn’t find one of them until the next day. Luckily, a squirrel had not tried to stuff it into his pouch and run off. (I mean in his mouth…I know that squirrels are not marsupials…)
Our eggs this year turned a little day-glo. I’m never happy with how our eggs turn out. Perhaps because I’ve got this in mind:
Am I setting the bar too high? HOW DO PEOPLE DO THIS???? Don’t tell me with some tiny little wax dropper…there’s no way. Have you seen what the side of a candle looks like after it’s been lit for an hour? That’s what I think of when I imagine dripping wax. Seriously…how can I get these egg elves to come to my house??? Maybe the people who make these are the same people who do nail art????
Look at those tiny flowers!!! It gets worse:
Three dimensional flowers…This person clearly does not cook.
Umm…is that real? This person clearly does not eat.
No comment necessary. This is not a person.
If ever my husband ever feels that I am not spending our money wisely, I’ll just show him this pic. Is an electric can opener really the sign of a cultural apocalypse? I think not.
slightly wonky 